Brandiuk
editor's note: I planned on pictures, and I promise I'll be better at putting pictures up soon. However, someone used my card reader and the work's laptop I'm using right now doesn't have one. How antiquated - how cute. So I will either add pictures to these later and you can go back and see them. Or one random blog entry (all threatened post-it note style mayhem) I'll just make sort of an album. 
PS - I didn't choose blogger for a reason. I wanted to start blogging. I knew nothing. I had too little equipment to do research just then. I use Gmail. No political or preferential statements, it just happened this way. So there. Now back to your originally scheduled programming.  

Last night, after making the kids french toast I realized we haven't bought eggs in a while. Not only do I not buy eggs anymore but the eggs we have are beautiful, tasty (once you can get around how rich they are), and wholesome.
Then, I started thinking about my first harvest. It is March, it will be a while, but my tomato plant has flowers on it...
I love the first harvest.
Then, I started thinking about cows. Cows are a lot of work, really they are. But wouldn't a cow just complete the set? I mean then I'd have my own milk, and I could seriously get around to making my own dairy products. I mean all cheese is just a variation on a theme. No scary growth hormones. And cows are cuddly.

I sometimes ponder this against the juxtaposition of my personality which requires me to live in cities larger than 500,000 pop., cities with culture and museums and have Ikeas in them. Yeah, you can dis Ikea all you want, I know I know, but I will always have a special place in my heart. (Ikea saved my life once, you don't forget debts like that).
That is why I am in love with the new Urban Farming movements. Let's bring it into the cities.
Still, I'm not sure I could get away with a cow. Los Ranchos in Albuquerque lets you have cows....

Wait, where was I?

A farm house, just the farm stead part. With a cow, a pony for the kids (the ad running on craig's list - Pony Seeking Young Girl to Love Him is killing me right now) and chickens. Some big lopey dogs running about. The kind that you don't have to let in the house if you don't want to. The kids, with ducks on the pond, catching tad poles....

Lost my train of thought. All this was brought to the forefront of my brain today by a conversation Stephanie had with her friend about why I keep chickens.
I suspect you have to have loved a chicken to get chickens. I'm not surprised, I mean they look like fat vultures and they make a real mess. There is that one, the Cochin that looks at me. No, you don't get it - the chicken looks at me.
Celia's baby Ameraucana doesn't move when you go to pick it up. She's so hand tame, she just sits there waiting to be picked up. Today, I realized her wings grew back when she head bobbed at me over and over and failing to notice that meant she wanted attention she flew onto my shoulder and into my hair. Baby chicken wings grow back at an alarming rate. So despite that she's half-feathered and looks pretty gawdawful, she got a kiss on the face, because she loves me. She peeps at me, she wanted to nuzzle my neck. Chickens are the new kittens.

To sum it up yes, in a heartbeat. I think I actually mentioned in a recent post (or post I've not edited and posted) that some of the happiest days of my life were spent on a family farm held by my cousins. I would quite happily take my children off to that environment - if someone else would do the work....
Which cracks me up on some level because I'm SO not country. Neither is my husband but he has the same vision. I think it has to do with the freedom of space we desire in our large family, and how feel-good watching kids around animals is. He was describing it to me the other day, free-range eggs. A safe work environment for people who want to go into Urban Farming themselves, or college kids working through college, or people with green cards who have a hard time finding work because they are still too other. A place the kids can have a pond, ride horses and have ducks. Organic food, grown on our own land by our own hands. Then, he went on to describe the inside of the house, with the movie wall - where one wall would be a cinema sized screen. Or his office with the most high powered computers words can describe. Or our satellite uplinks. We're so neither nor - but at least we match each other. Or maybe we just need to be rich, because looking at it that lifestyle describes the lifestyle of people with money and large estates.

So what's the plan?
Brandiuk
So odd, I'm so tired I was just about to write "this Friday brings me with very little to report."
Have I posted since Friday? Am I lost in space? Yeah, I'd believe it. This has been a very weird weekend.
We had 2 rounds of little league, 2 lacrosse games, a study date and more I'm sure. We went to the museum, we entertained friends, we were entertained by friends, we farewelled friends (how sad) and so on.
So today, mostly I'm just tired and not as thoughtful. I was thoughtful earlier but I needed to get to the computer hours earlier and now I've totally lost the thread. Ah well, your loss.
I don't do emoticons or there would have been a smiley face there, print is such a dry medium, can you read irony or sarcasm? Only if it is slathered on, usually I'm not a slathery person.

I have my moments though. You know it.

This reminds me of an interesting segment of my day taken up by toast. Remind me to talk about toast. Toast and Toast torture racks and steam producing toast and slathered toast. All this deserves its very own post.
No, seriously.

One day, I'll read my own blog with a post-it pad in hand and write down all the things I've threatened to talk about at other times and then my dear reader you're in for it.

Tara -
Brandiuk
For someone who doesn't always send the most positive and less than ranting messages out there into (cyber)space I want to warn you that here for just a second I'm going to fall completely out of character and wax lyrical. 

I love little league. It is currently my favorite past time. I love seen a field full of 5 year old children looking tiny and running the wrong way around bases. I love that their gloves are bigger than their heads and their bats hit pretty much everything but the ball on the stand. I love that they feel like the most important people on the entire face of the earth when they are wearing their little embroidered baseball caps and their matching shirts. 
I love watching them count to 4 while trying to remember all the steps to throwing a ball, or that the coach lets them run to their mothers off field every time someone takes a ball to the face. I love that I have found the first group of fully functioning people in my general vicinity in quite a long time. The school the boys are attending seems to be firing on all 4's. Celia's does too for the most part, but recreationally I have not found a lot to compare to the little league folks.
I can't describe to you the cuteness of my son in his uniform, telling me how proud he is to wear the uniform, how proud he is he got to pick his own number, or the fact that he counted down the minutes to the day the uniform was supposed to arrive.
His older brother, born and begun to be raised in England just struck me as the archetypal baseball kid. I had visions on him in little baseball pants and cap and seeing that vision unfold - exactly as I imagined it - years later actually lit a joy in my heart. I love seeing his face as he pays exceedingly close attention to his coach and mimics to the best of his ability every stance and movement. He might not be the fastest but he'll be one of the most accurate players on the field. He's not slow either, he's just precise. He hit 4 out of 5 balls at his last practice, and it is machine pitch but given that this is his first go-round that's not half bad - no? 
I love his slim, tiny little body in his bright red socks and white pants and bright red belt and nationals shirt and cap. 
I love that they email me, text me, and call me. I love that the coaches know every kid by name (!), and parent, and every single last form that every single last person has or hasn't filled out and what each kid is good at. I might be easily impressed on us but you're talking about a place where 8 weeks after he joined his cub scout leader not only kept asking him if he was new, had yet to swear him in, but also had no idea who he was. I love that the joining fee included everything, the uniforms, the trophy, the party they get when it is all over and so on. 
My youngest son's coach is a great coach and I agree with everything he says, all his calls and the way he handles small children. I also love that he lectured the parents on how to be good sports parents. "We're not here to win, that doesn't mean we're here to lose. You are here for the enjoyment of your children, plain and simple. You are not allowed to make this thing out to be more than it is or take it too seriously, you are here to make your kid happy."
Maybe not everyone - but I SO agree with that and I liked hearing it. 
Plus, I get the obligatory I'm-doing-something-right-wholesome-feel-good-vibe when I sit out on the grass or in the bleachers watching the kids practice. We're outside, we're being active and fit, we're breathing real air, we're learning something, we're bonding with our team. 
I love that the parents memorize all the little kids names so they can cheer your kid on when he's on a base. How cool is that? Really!? 
Anyway - I'm sure that's enough for now. I just had to get it off my chest.

Speaking of chests - our current youngest chick is making me more than a little crazy. We realized the blacks we had were just too big for Queak and Buttercup and decided on adding a smaller breed (not to the point of bantam) to the brood. We're still under our city limit, so it felt ok. We got another chick and not only does she bully the older flock mercilessly (keep in mind she's like 3 days old) but she peeps around the clock. Now, would it be too wrong for me to sneak her back to the feed store and switch her with a look alike? Would it? Would it? 
She is cute - she is plushy - my children love her. She incurs my strong desire to eat her (it's a maternal thing, unless you've had kids you wouldn't understand - ask me sometime how bizarre I find the desire to actually consume your children is - I mean what kinda genetic freak of instinct is that?). 
Anyway, it is unusually early for me and I might not be making tons of sense here. I love the little mite but, you know, just a warning, I totally don't think I'm above sneaking her back to the feed store....

The first of my emergent little seeds have sprung. Sweet as sweet are new seeds but they are more nerve wracking than any baby creatures I can think of. I mean even 3 day old chick (see above) is more resilient. After all, the chick can bite your finger nails and handle being carried around in someone's pocket half the day. In the meantime, every time a new seed sprouts Buttercup becomes so excited she will try carrying it around in her pocket all day and of course it then dies. At which point she tells me it is sleeping. 
Sleeping seeds are surely one of my favorite things ever to come out of the child's mouth. Though I get at least one of those quotes off her about once a day. Her verbal skills are unlikely to let her down in this life. 
Some part of me wants to put them (the seedlings, follow the plot) in the freezer, like you would a sick koi and then move on. Move on to pansies from Home Depot and other hard to kill things that come ready grown by the 12 pack. Some part of me is wanting to get the pansies anyway for a few reasons; instant gratification; the back-up lovers of the flower world - there and ready to hold me when my little seeds finally succumb to natural selection; maybe they'll teach the seedlings how to grow, be role-models; etc..

 On that note -

(editor's note: Is that not what you do with sick koi? Because I so totally have it on good-koi-keeping authority that it so totally is)

Brandiuk
Thoughts on Thursday posts are easy. You just write all the random thoughts you're thinking. Super easy. Perfect for the almost end of the week when your brain is too fried to be witty. You should try it. Grab the button, paste it in a blog post, and start writing your thoughts!

  •  First off, it isn't Thursday it is Friday.
  • What happened to Thursday?
  • I started this on Thursday?
  • If I can have 15 chickens why does one more chicken more or less worry me, how does one pesky, nanny-goat of a neighbor bother me so much that I feel like I can't have what I want and be happy?
  • Why do chickens make me so happy?
  • Is it spring yet - can I put the tomatoes out? 
  • Why isn't there some bank in the cosmos where I can buy back the days I've lost somehow? Yesterday went to the storms (internal - not climate) and today isn't much better. Or the days you lose to flu, or the days you lose to headaches? 
  • Why can't I remember the things I had to say on Thursday itself?
  • It had something to do with Leif - right?
  • I need a bigger house, and a bigger yard - where is it? 
  • Why when I lose my patience will no one leave me a lone long enough to find it? 
  • I should mail this stupid popcorn, there is no way I'm making it to Amarillo this year. 
  • Maybe if Dawn comes here then she can get the popcorn - when is Dawn coming here?
  • I never want to be involved in popcorn sales again - ever. 
  • No, I don't want to teach again next year - leave me alone, see above (patience)
  • sigh
  • Dear baby chicken, why for dost thou peep?
  • I need to write something in my appointment book - damn! I keep forgetting! 
  • I don't actually want to volunteer at the May bookfair. It wasn't hard but I'm still in anti-social mode.
  • How did the class fish go unnoticed sitting on my kitchen table for a whole week past spring break? 
  • Damn!
  • One of my seeds molded - and it was only one, but it hurt my feelings. 
  • How pathetic is getting weepy over seeds?
  • Because Brian says I'm not allowed to spend money on real plants this year as he is tired of spending money on things that die in October. However, I argue we spend money on entertainment and food and these are just a variation on that, right?
  • Yes, the man did wash up my seeds. He didn't mean to, but he saw the cups as dishes and the seeds as suspicious black growing things in the cups and he failed all together to recognize that they were the seeds he helped me nick, or the dates written clearly on the cups, or the types of seeds labeled. He also failed to notice they were on the tray with all the peat pots. It only set me back 4 days but still it really bugged me. I mean after all I'm not allowed to spend money on established plants this year. 
  • Dear baby chicken? Is it really such a deal? Could you peep a bit less when my head throbs so much? 
  • Is it odd that my daughter is making her older brother pretend to be her Mommy? 
  • Can someone please give me all those lost days back in the form of a lump sum, and set someplace on a tropical beach? 
  • I don't like sand but I'm willing to put up with it for the serenity the waves give me. 
  • I didn't used to like the ocean, it snuck up on me. 
  • After watching about 15 hours of shark week the other weekend with the boys I've changed my mind about getting a beach house though. 
  • Hey - about that leaving alone and patience thing...
  • Eh - this is probably thoughtful enough, see you tomorrow.
Brandiuk
I've not been on in a while.
Partly because I wanted to see how much time the online world was consuming in my life and see what I would do with less time spent online. Partly because all of our working computers were not working, and therefore going online became a major endeavor. Going online was not really worth my time, or the frustrations.
Sometimes, I wonder why I bothered with the internet when it was dial-up. I was such a pioneer.

Anyway, with a computer back, and working, I thought - "oh I should go online and say something useful." However, after having been offline all this time I got nothin.
Nothing of any import or use to say. Maybe because it is after 9pm and my brain has shut off. Maybe because I have a headache.
Maybe because I've not vigilantly kept track of things I have to say. I should keep post-it notes or something. Then, of course, the funny part would be looking at post-its with random words on them wondering what the hell they were all about and scrunching them up and throwing them away. Or perhaps I would save them for posterity. Or maybe I'd repost them until they became significant again.
Firefox says repost is not a word. I'm sure it would accept a hyphen in there, well guess what - it ain't gonna get one. Funny, it accepts ain't. Sigh, I give up.

Queak has discovered the word bitch but he doesn't know it is derogatory. He thinks it is a sound affect. He heard it on tv, and he thought it was hysterical. The other night I turned the tv on, and the channel it was on blared out South Park, for the 5 seconds it took for me to panickedly reach for the channel button he heard approximately 10 swear words. Again, sigh. I have been trying to decide all day what to do about this. I'm not sure I want to draw attention to the word since he is genuinely oblivious about the meaning. On the other hand, it has to stop - now.

Buttercup has learned to make unpleasant grunting, squealing noises to express her displeasure at parental rulings. She's 3, and she's arguably the most spoiled of my children but she is perilously close to discovering what soap tastes like.

Leif has some form of PTSD regarding the blow he took to his head recently. The stitches are out, but from time to time he has nightmare style flashbacks of the ER, and from time to time he comes to me, curls up on my lap and clings to me sort of weepy for no reason. Admittedly the day scared the living hell out of me too. Sometimes I marvel at how different they are, Queak who insist stitches in the face not only don't hurt but had no affect on him at all and Leif who is showing signs of mental distress every time someone mentions that day. I know that I am a devoted enough mother that I will go with them to the ER every time the need arises. I also know that days like that likely take years off my life and I am pretty sure I need to check myself in the next time to be treated for shock.
This is all strangely compounded with the fact that Leif is adamant that he will break a leg soon. This was a palm-reading he got some time ago, and he believes it so utterly that I'm not sure what to do with him. I keep asking myself if I'll be strong enough to be the person who holds his hand when they re-set the bone. Can't they get someone who looks like me? Surely the hospital has stand-in mothers on tap?

The kids have approximately 2 months left of school. I wonder what next year will be like, if they will have teachers who mean anything near as much to them as the current lot. Is this their halcyon year or is this one of many blended years? I just often wish it didn't all go so fast.
Having said that, I'm tired and glad the school year is drawing to a close. I need the summer. I need to see things in bloom and wake when we wake and sleep when we sleep.

My friend is leaving soon, to go home to Delaware. Today, when she was at my house I had a hard time imagining her leave. I suppose that's always the way, really. I hope it is what she needs it to be. Friday, we will go to a farewell dinner for her, a chocolate dinner. Who can say no to chocolate dinners?

That's about all I have for now. Perhaps I'll be witty tomorrow - if the computer is still here and still working even.